Listen and validate – what to do if someone may be suicidal

From the book – Chapter 18: Mental-Health Emergency and Safety

Listen and validate

1. Speak calmly and respectfully.

2. Let them express feelings without interruption.

3. Avoid arguing, minimising, or moralising ("Think of your family", "This is selfish").

4. Validate pain: I can see how much you are suffering. I am here with you.

Read the full chapter – Chapter 18: Mental-Health Emergency and Safety

Stories from real life

• The Message to the Team – Dev, 24, a colleague of Mira's in Mumbai, sends a late message that says, "Tell the team I am sorry for everything. I won't be a…
• The Night the Neighbour Stopped Sleeping – Mrs Dsouza, 45, in Bengaluru, had been unwell for years and stopped her medicine last month. For four days she has not slept, believes the neighbours…
• Too Much, Too Fast – At a college party in Goa, Kunal, 20, drinks heavily after his friends dare him. Later he is slumped on a sofa, hard to wake, breathing…
• Four Lines on a Card – After a hospital stay, Anjali, 32, in Delhi has made it through a very dark week. Her counsellor suggests building a safety plan together on one…

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More questions

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• Understanding substance-related emergencies – mental-health emergencies
• Understanding creating a safety plan – mental-health emergencies
• Understanding after a crisis – mental-health emergencies
• What is true: if someone expresses suicidal thoughts, you should…?
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